Hatred- I hate

Sometimes I get this feeling of Anger
That is unexplained and contradictory
To my nature that is
Which is emboldened by a cigerette
Smoked in invincibilty

It is a feeling I cannot explain
Even to myself let alone others
Makes me feel cocky and cynical
And that I can conquer the world
With anger and hatred rather than
Try the mellow other

I thought this world could
not move me no more
with its stories of ever horror
I asked myself why
A story of say child abuse
By an organisation as big as the UN peacekeepers
Gave shock no more to me

I have become emmersed in this hatred
The world has come to spread
And I find people all around me
In different types of guilt trips
In an effort to overcome
And satisfy ones own pitiful existance

That’s all it is a lifelong guilt trip

People like to talk about these things
Like China Myanmar as if
They sypathise with the plight
And in that they are human
But I do not see any humanity in that

There are others who go
One step furthur and give
A portion of their earnings to
A fund set up to help people
In need and feel good about themselves

That too is nothing but a glorified guilt trip

And then there are those who admit
That they do not feel any feeling
And in that their strong and believe
In the survival of the fittest

In them either I do not find the humanity I look for

And yet I find humanity in small things
That I come across when I feel these strong emotions
That always bring me back to earth
And make me believe!
Something as simple as a one line email
From a sister I love very much.